Tag Archives: strengths

Three Tips to Increase Your Self-Awareness

How self-aware are you – really? During a typical day are you tuned in to your emotions (positive & negative) when they are actually occurring? Can you label these feelings and do you know why they are being triggered right now? And most importantly, do you take the time to learn from these insights and consciously use this learning to improve in your career?

Sounds easy . . . but actually this level of awareness takes constant practice. Here are three tried and true ways to “self-coach” yourself to increase your self-awareness a day at a time.

  1. Slow down! Give yourself permission to simply be in the moment. Focus on what you are doing right now, minimize the distractions and let yourself concentrate.
  2. Next check-in with your feelings each hour (or more frequently). What are you feeling physically, emotionally and mentally? Label these feelings in your own words.
  3. Ask yourself what these emotions are telling you – what personal values, concerns, hopes or worries are being triggered?

Now the important part . . . listen to your own intuition to gain some insight into how you might approach a challenging issue or situation at work. What is coming up regularly and why? Challenge yourself to be curious. Allow yourself to step back, think, and perhaps take another path to solving a problem. Be open to learning from the best teacher you know – yourself.

 

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Emotional Intelligence 2.0

Emotional Intelligence 2.0, 2009, Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves, Talent Smart, San Diego, California. 

This book is a bit different. Although, I have a whole library of books on social & emotional intelligence very few offer concrete action steps on how to improve the various elements of emotional intelligence. The Talent Smart team has done that nicely in this small purse sized book. It is filled with great and very practical suggestions on what each of us can do on a daily basis to practice these competencies. Pick it up and just select one area for yourself per day to practice. You will be delightfully surprised how well you begin mastering these skills.

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The Happiness Advantage

The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuel Success and Performance, by Shawn Achor, Random House Publishers, New York, New York. (2010)

I found this book fascinating because it clearly shakes up our old cultural beliefs that first we need to find external “successes” before we will find “happiness”. Achor takes us along his research path – starting first with Harvard University freshman – and then into the wealth of studies in positive psychology over the last several years. I’m convinced! My time and energy is best spent on ensuring that I maximize my positive emotions to benefit both my professional and personal life.

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Emotional Intelligence: Use It or Lose Your Career!

You may think I’m exaggerating but it’s true. The #1 reason professionals stumble in their career advancement is because of their lack of social and emotional intelligence. They may have all the knowledge, skills and even years of experience but they have earned a reputation for not being able to get along with their colleagues, direct reports or even their bosses.  In short, their own self-awareness; empathy for others and ability to manage their own emotions is limited or nonexistent.

These folks (are we talking about you?) are just known for being difficult – they don’t listen, are confrontational, unpredictable and even arrogant in their beliefs. They may be in a supervisory or middle management position because they have been with the company for so long but now their career is on thin ice and they wonder why.  But others know why . . .

So what exactly is “social and emotional intelligence”?  Here is a excellent working defination from the Institute for Social & Emotional Intelligence (ISEI), Denver, Colorado.

  • “Social and emotional intelligence is the ability to be aware of our own emotions and those of others, in the moment, and to use that information to manage ourselves and manage our relationships”.

I’ve been giving workshops on emotional intelligence (EQ) for years – it’s truly my favorite topic because it impacts every aspect of our working and personal lives.  I’m delighted now to be in an intensive coach certification course (October – November) through ISEI with my Australian coaching colleagues to learn even more.  I’ve already started to pull new ideas and tools into my training courses and with my individual coaching clients.

So let’s remember that 80 – 85% of our career success at the upper levels depends on our ability to connect, communicate and collaborate with others. Our own personal work experiences confirm that research.  We have all known industry leaders who have those qualities – they inspire, motivate and engage their teams and employees resulting in people working harder with energy, creativity and greater flexibility.  The result? Less employee turnover; higher productivity and greater profits for the company.

This is emotional intelligence competencies in action. Let’s be known as one of those leaders!

 

 

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The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change, by Stephen R. Covey, Simon & Schuster, 1989.

Covey’s timeless book “7 Habits” is still the best of the best in helping all of us develop our personal and professional effectiveness in every aspect of our lives. But in improving our communication skills Habit #5 “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood” says it all. It captures the essence of what I’m saying regarding the pitfalls of making hasty and often inaccurate assumptions when working with others.

So go pull out your own copy (everyone has at least one well worn copy) and flip open to page 236. Or ask your bookstore about the new edition coming out in November! Covey challenges us to listen (and therefore connect) to others on a deeper level before making assumptions that often get in the way of healthy communication.

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