Kit Prendergast, PCC
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Category Archives: Communication Tips
Choose Not to Be Afraid
At 4:45am each morning I take the dogs outside for their first potty beak and to pick up our local paper off the front driveway. As our golden retriever and westie (Snowball & Dooley) are rolling in the snow making snow angels, I am glancing at the paper’s headlines under the garage lights.
Almost without fail, the front page stories shout at me about something that is going to immediately endanger myself or my family. It can be anything from global terrorism; the national economy, our local unemployment statistics; home foreclosure rates or a whole array of looming health disasters that will kill me off before the day is done. I’m surprised I can stagger back into the house for my first cup of coffee.
Fear, worry and anxiety are epidemic in our world today. The media, our politicians and even our family & friends are telling us constantly to “be afraid” of everything and anything. Yes, there are some very real things in 2013 that we need to be concerned about but do we really have to be worried 24/7? No, we don’t!
It’s our choice – what are we going to be concerned about (in a healthy way) and what are we going to let go. It takes practice but over time each of us develops an inner “check list” of what is worth getting our “knickers in a twist” (as the Brits say) and what needs to go on the back burner. That’s when our inner voice – the language – we use in speaking to ourselves becomes critical.
My challenge to you, is to pay attention to what media generated “fear” can hook you and then be touch with yourself in choosing your response. It’s your choice. Do I retreat to my comfort zone? Second guess myself constantly? Become critical of others? Cynical of the world around me? Think about it . . . and I hope you choose to put fear in its proper place. You are in control . . . not it.
To Delegate or Not? A Struggle for Leaders
To delegate or not? Delegation is one of biggest challenges for a leader in today’s work world. With work loads increasing, more complex problems to solve and fewer staff to cover the bases it’s no surprise that anyone in a leadership role (managers, supervisors, team leads etc.) struggle with the who, what, when, why and how of delegating wisely.
Why is it so hard?
As a executive coach, this is what I hear from both experienced leaders and emerging leaders in both corporate, government and non-profit business environments.
- It takes too much time for me to explain it.
- I’m not sure it will be done right.
- I could do it faster, easier, cheaper etc.
- If someone else does it – maybe I’m not needed as much.
- I don’t want to bother people – they’re already working hard enough.
- I don’t want to be self-important. (Jimmy Carter carrying his own suitcase)
Getting In Our Own Way
So the bottom line is that we often get in our own way. Are we a perfectionist? No one else can do it as well as me. Or do we delegate too much to one person that we trust but then others don’t get a chance. Are we concerned that if the other person does a great job that maybe – just maybe – we will be working our way out of a job. Or maybe it’s simply the rush we get from being that “go-to” person all the time even if it means working 24/7.
Those are important questions to ask ourselves. Are we actually the biggest obstacle to ourselves because we can’t get out of our own way?
What does a good role model look like?
Interesting, leaders often mention that they haven’t had a good role model in delegating over the years either from parents, colleagues or bosses. So in a great round robin discussion these 7 qualities were identified by experienced leaders as critical for a “ideal delegator”.
- They create a “culture of delegation”.
- They create a “culture of mutual trust”.
- They plan ahead so they aren’t “dumping” tasks on others.
- They delegate “results” not just “activities”.
- They delegate both important and maintenance tasks as well.
- They have confidence in their staff and want to utilize their staff’s strengths.
- They are truly committed to growing & developing their staff.
So how do you measure up? Are you willing to get out of the way and let others grow, develop and succeed? If so, you will be delightfully surprised how it will help you be more productive, manage your time and energy better and ultimately provide greater benefits to your own company. And the icing on the cake is less stressLet me know how you are doing!
Using “We” For Sense of Ownership
It’s such a simple word “We”. It’s easy to forget the emotional connection this simple word has the power to create.
Savvy leaders know this and they wisely use “we” in their communication with their functional and project teams. They know that this word shifts people’s mindset from an “I” or “me” mentality to a shared vision and commitment.
Suddenly, there is a sense of ownership. It’s subtle but the feeling is that we are in this all together – sink or swim – we are connected together and will all share in the success or failure of our efforts.
That’s very powerful. And it’s simply a shift in language. But it must be authentic. The leader must be genuine in their belief that the synergy of highly motivated and committed people is through a sense of ownership. As we know it truly “takes a village”.
“The Art of Political Conversation” A Unique Workshop
What fun! I was invited to speak on KJFK 230 AM this past Saturday morning, Sept. 29th, on “The Art of Political Conversation”. Chip Evans and his co-host Verita Black Prothro are anchoring a progressive talk radio show “Get Real, America!” every Saturday morning at 9:00am dedicated to opening the conversation in Northern Nevada on progressive issues and concerns.
Chip and I are an experienced political training team. We have been working with the Nevada Democratic field organizers since 2004 on all aspects of leadership and political activism. For this political cycle, we are offering our evenings and weekends to meet with community groups and field organizers to teach the fine art of engaging in a political conversation without being triggered. And that’s not easy in this political climate!
This is a fast moving, interactive 1 1/2 hour skills-based workshop. Participants get hands-on practice in these state-of-the-art communication skills. And what Chip and I enjoy most is the feedback we get from the college students, Republicans turned Democrats and the many, many dedicated volunteers willing to spend their free time working on behalf of progressive values and condidates. After every workshop, they tell us they have more confidence and more concrete tools to engage in that next conversation at the door, on the phone or with their Republican brother-in-law at Thanksgiving dinner.
Are You a “Go-To” Person?
What a great question! And if the answer is yes (and I hope it is) then the logical follow-up question is “What do people go to you for? You may never have thought about it. The answer may only be one word. For example, people tell me that they come to me for “energy” or “inspiration”. Maybe people come to you for your “wisdom” or for your “guidance” in challenging situations. Or maybe you are in the inside loop and are known for some unique “knowledge” or “expertise/experience”. It’s different for everyone and you may not even know for certain.
Your “Go-To” Reputation is Part of Your Brand
It’s a important question . . . what do others come to you for? I always ask this question when working with people around building their career performance and long-term success. And if they like the answer (which is very important) then we weave it into their personal and career brand so they own it – take control of it. It means that we are being seen as a resource – a valuable resource. We have something to offer relatively quickly and without a great deal of hassle. We are approachable, easy to get in contact with and can be trusted to listen and provide some help. Now that is a great reputation to have.
Remember! It doesn’t mean you have all the answers or that you’re going to take on all or even part of the work. In fact, it’s very important that you don’t see yourself in that role but rather that you have the contacts and the willingness to help connect others with resources. It means that you are a connector – a person in the know. That is an excellent reputation to have!
Learning from Sheila Leslie, Nevada State Senator
Just yesterday, I had the chance to listen to a wonderful member of the Nevada State Legislature, Sheila Leslie, State Senator, speak about her role in the legislature. In response to a question from the audience, Leslie shared how she mentors and advises newly elected legislators. And she knows what she’s talking about . . . Leslie has served Northern Nevada since 1998 first as a State Assemblywoman and now as a State Senator. She is very well-respected and best known for her expertise and experience in the health and human services.
So it was no surprise that Leslie’s advice to young legislators is to become a “go-to” person in an area you are interested in; you have some expertise and you are willing to help others. And that’s exactly what Leslie has done for years. Right out of graduate school, she served in the poorest areas of the Dominican Republic with the Peace Corp; started the first Food Bank in Nevada and worked for years establishing a network of child protective community services. Out of these personal experiences and passion, Leslie has become the valuable “go-to” person on these issues. This is her reputation and a very powerful influential brand. She’s an inspiration to all of us!